I was reflecting on this dark time we’ve been thrust into and the thought of how desperately we all want this horrific plague to come to an end! Oh, how I’ve cried to God to wipe the nasty virus and all of its evil off of the face of the earth!

We pray and we wait for good news!  Yet, we turn on the TV for an update and the news is worse!  There are moments of good squeezed in between the suffering.  There are miracles happening but we don’t really get to see most of them.  I have an acquaintance that we’ve prayed for who was unconscious and on a ventilator, dying alone in a hospital full of strangers. His family was told to make plans because this was his end.  We cried with the family yet we prayed for a miracle.  A couple of days later, he woke up, he was coherent, and he began to breathe on his own.  He is now recovering and will be going home, healed!  Praise God!

During my own dark time several years ago, I was told the cancer I faced was very aggressive. There were no options other than chemo.  I had hoped that additional opinions would tell me something different and that I’d be given good news but with each appointment, the news didn’t change.  I had to make a choice at that time to fight – but not with my own might.  I knew I needed God’s help.  I prayed and I waited and I prayed and I waited.  As I did what I had to do physically, I also did what I had to do spiritually!

It’s amazing how when we’re faced with a life-threatening issue, we can turn to God more easily.  I loved God and had a personal relationship with Him, but it was that moment of desperation which caused my hunger and thirst for HIM to heighten and my spiritual eyes to turn to Him in full reliance. He filled me up with the substance of His word which is Faith, and eventually my prayer was answered and I was able to see the evidence of things I had hoped for!  That’s why I call that period of time my “waiting room”.

Now, in this time, we wait together.  We wait for good news but we don’t see it yet.  People are still dying and our earth is crying out for this nightmare to end.


For we were saved in this hope, but hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees?”   (Romans 8:24 – NKJV)

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” (Hebrews 11:1 – KJV)


One thing God taught me through my time of waiting was that He does not live in time as we know it …. He lives in eternity, which is above and beyond time.  This waiting seems like forever to us on this side – but we can’t let that play with our minds. We need to stand firmly in faith, not doubting that our Lord has heard our prayers…. and let patience do its perfect work.


 “But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.”  (James 1:4)


In this dark time on the earth, we can choose to look to the light of God and reflect on His promises.

Miracles do happen even in dark times.  And in the darkest hour ever in all of history, a miracle came upon the earth.  Jesus died and took upon Himself all of our sins in His own body on the tree!  He bore our sicknesses and diseases. He gave Himself up for us and paid for all of our sins. He defeated death, hell and the grave when HE ROSE AGAIN! HE IS ALIVE! THIS IS THE BEST MIRACLE EVER!  If God did that for us, why would we doubt that He IS ABLE! This is a trustworthy God!

“But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”     (1 Corinthians 15:57 – NIV)


Image from YOU’VE GOT TO BELIEVE YOU’RE GOING TO BE OK – From Fear To Faith, by Lorraine Brown



“For he taught his disciples, and said unto them, The Son of man is delivered into the hands of men, and they shall kill him; and after that he is killed, he shall rise the third day.”   (Mark 9:31 – KJV)


Just about two minutes in length



1 Peter 2:24 – Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed.

John 3:16-17 – For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

Mark 9:31 – For he taught his disciples, and said unto them, The Son of man is delivered into the hands of men, and they shall kill him; and after that he is killed, he shall rise the third day.

Mark 10:34 – And they shall mock him, and shall scourge him, and shall spit upon him, and shall kill him: and the third day he shall rise again.

Isaiah 53:5 – But he [was] wounded for our transgressions, [he was] bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace [was] upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

Romans 5:6-10 – For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.  

Mark 8:31 – And he began to teach them, that the Son of man must suffer many things, and be rejected of the elders, and [of] the chief priests, and scribes, and be killed, and after three days rise again.

John 19:1-42 – Then Pilate therefore took Jesus, and scourged [him].  

Matthew 12:40 – For as Jonas was three days and three nights in the whale’s belly; so shall the Son of man be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth.


 All  above scriptures are taken from the King James Version.





I was listening to a sermon about being in captivity.  The following scriptures were used to point out how much God wants to free us from our captivity.


Psalm 80: verses 3, 7, and 19 (NKJV):   All three of these verses say the same thing:

“Restore us, O God; make your face shine on us, that we may be saved.”

The King James Version says:  “Restore us again…”


This is the take away from the lesson:

1):   No matter how many times God has restored you in the past, He can do it again!


2):   Isaiah 42:18-19  (NKJV): 

“Hear, you deaf; And look, you blind, that you may see. Who is blind but My servant, or deaf as My messenger whom I send?  Who is blind as he who is perfect, And blind as the Lord’s servant?”

God was saying:

*** I sent my prophets to be my mouthpiece to tell the poeple what I am saying, but they are spiritually blind and deaf and not seeing what I want to do or hearing what I want to say.  As a result of this, the people are robbed and spoiled (plundered – taken from, as a victim in robbery).  In other words, when you are not hearing the word of God, satan will rob from you and hold you in captivity.***

So ,,, God wants His servants to be spiritually alert so they can hear what He is saying.

***Isaiah 42: 22 (NKJV):  “But this is a people robbed and plundered; All of them are snared in holes, and they are hidden in prison houses; They are for prey, and no one delivers; For plunder, and no one says, “Restore!”

WOW!!!  This really jumped out at me:  “…they are hidden in prison houses”

They are in captivity!  It made me think immediately of the situation we are all in right now…

We are hidden in our houses. In some ways we are hidden in our safe sanctuaries away from danger. 

Praise God for that!!! 

However,  I can’t help but think…the longer this goes on, we could start feeling as if our hiding places are becoming “prison houses”. 

Then I felt God saying…This is not forever. 

Again I say Praise God!!!

And then I felt Him asking if….on a deeper level – a spiritual level, even when we are free to roam about again, will we really be free?  Will we be restored within – deep inside the heart? Will we allow God inside to set us free?


3):  God was wanting the prophets to tell the people:   GOD WANTS TO RESTORE!  (to repair, renew, reconstruct, rehabilitate, remodel, replace, refund, return, resuscitate, reestablish, revive).


4):  GOD IS SAYING to us now:


  • Let your spiritual eyes see and your spiritual ears hear what The Lord is saying!


  • Turn to HIM if you have never turned to HIM before.  Turn to HIM now and put your trust in HIM and HE will turn your captivity!


  • If you knew HIM before, but turned away from HIM for some reason, then RETURN to HIM now and HE will turn your captivity! 


  • If you know HIM and have put your trust in HIM and you have not turned away from HIM, then RAISE  YOUR  VOICE and speak HIS Word so the people will hear what the LORD wants them to hear…..


5):   (ISAIAH 42:2):   “none say, Restore”  

God wants us to say it!  “Restore us, O God; make your face shine on us, that we may be saved.”

Will you join me in saying  …..  ” God is turning my captivity and restoring my life!!! “

God wants to restore, but He needs us to give voice to it!


6):  Let us put our trust in God, Who created the heavens and the earth with His mighty power and His outstretched arm, because nothing is impossible for HIM!

Let us speak HIS words over our situation! 

Let us raise our voices in Praise to Him!   PRAISE IS GOD’S ADDRESS!

(Psalm 56:3-4 NKJV):   “Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in YOU. In God (I will praise His word), In God I have put my trust; I will NOT fear. What can flesh do to me?”


7):  We’ve been through the fire and through the quagmire!  But now is our time to WIN!!!

Psalm 66:12 (NKJV):   “You have caused men to ride over our heads; We went through fire and through water; But You brought us out to rich fulfillment.”

All that the children of Israel went through God turned around, and brought them through to a wealthy place…. A place of HEALING!  A place of DELIVERANCE!  A place of FREEDOM!   A place of VICTORY!

What God did for His children then, He will do for His children NOW. 







I will say RESTORE!  –  



My mom had a recipe book she had written (by hand)…

A collection of her favorite recipes which she intended for me to have.

Over the years, it disappeared….perhaps during one of our moves. I looked tirelessly for it, hoping it would pop up, but it didn’t.

I was telling my cousin, Diane about it and she mentioned that my mother had sent her a few hand written recipes.  She said still had them and said that she was going to photocopy them and mail me the originals.

A couple of days later, they arrived. I was extremely touched by the thoughtfulness and love of my dear cousin.

As I opened the envelope, I sat with tear-filled eyes, holding my mother’s recipe cards in my hands, and feeling like a part of her was still with me. 

I held the paper she held…

I studied the crafting of each letter in her penmanship…in the way she swirled her capital L; the way she blended the letters together in an artistic script, unique to her as she formed each word with pen on paper, in an articulate manner…such that when I read her words, I can hear her voice – the cadence in which she spoke; the tone; the softness; the upbeat and joyful spirit in which she communicated; the humor she interjected. I can see her smile when I read her sassy, witty side notes which bring back the memory of that sparkle in her eyes- that little sense of mischief… the playfulness that she never failed to entertain us with.

                                                                            Mom’s comments on the back of one of her recipe cards:


                             (As you can see below, she “no likie” sage… and apparently, I was one of hte 5 little piggies) 😉



There is a little spot of something here at the top of the card. it looks like a drop of an ingredient or a little bit of gravy…

The smudge just confirms that this recipe was used and enjoyed throughout the years … and passed along now to me and to others. 

Oh, how I wish I could smell the gravy on this note!


My heart is warmed by the thought of times spent in the kitchen together while I measured ingredients and placed them side by side for my mom to incorporate into her wonderful creations. I can see her stirring, whipping, rolling dough, forming meatballs, sautéing onions and garlic for spaghetti sauce, placing roasts in the oven, removing the stew meat from the pressure cooker, frying bacon and eggs and measuring coffee into her percolator.  I recall the comforting mornings of waking up smelling the wonderful aroma of that coffee and oh, yes, the bacon sizzling and wafting throughout house, waking me from my morning slumber………no alarm clock needed!

These notes… 

represent even more depth of meaning to me because toward the end of my mother’s life, a stroke robbed her of her words…she could no longer speak, but she would smile and clap her hands every time I went to visit…a huge blessing that she always recognized me!  She would light up when I entered the room, wiggling her toes, clapping her hands and smiling and laughing, her entire body filled with excitement!

I’m reminded by her written word of how full of life she was and I have tangible pieces of conversations here to hold in my hands; to press to my heart;

to cherish; and to taste … as I savor each morsel of her recipes …  for food …

and for life!


                                                                                     In in her words…  😉




Her hands…

Held me tenderly the moment I arrived,                                                      

Nourished me and nurtured

As she welcomed me to life…








Her hands…

Bathed; clothed and fed me;

Held my little hand and led me;

Taught me how to write…

Turned the pages of the books she read to me each night,

Folded as she prayed

And clapped for my school plays;









Her hands…

Like magic, turned patterns into clothes and knitted slipper socks;

They softly styled waves into my curly locks,

Felt my forehead for a fever and rubbed Vick’s onto my chest,

And wiped my nose and held me close and softly caressed;

When I skinned a knee,

They bandaged me

And carried me back home,

And never left my side…

I never felt alone.

Her hands

Cooked my favorite foods,                 

And baked my favorite pies,

And when I was hurt or sad

They wiped the tears from my eyes;

Her hands drew pretty pictures,

In fact, they crafted art

And they touched me with a mother’s love

As they held this child’s heart!

Now I look down at my hands

And I’m amazed to see…





Her hands

Seem to have re-appeared,

As they live on….

In me!  

(written by Lorraine Brown, copyright 2011)        

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The legacy

she leaves behind

is one of kindness and delight,

She loved the life she lived

and she lived it right!

So when I see a shadow

dancing in the wind,

I’ll remember momma’s spirit

and the joyful life she lived!


(excerpt from “Annie’s Shadow”; written by Lorraine Brown © 2011)         





I was honored to be featured in Winnetka Living Magazine’s August, 2019 issue. Acclaimed author, poet, instructor, and multi-talented writer, Charlotte Digregorio was so kind to include me in her lovely column titled, “Creatively Versed”.  The attached photos are of the cover and the column featuring my poem “Cheaters” – a humorous look at the realization that the eyes don’t lie ;).



Also, below are a couple of links to a previous post mentioning Charlotte and her generous encouragement.  In 2012 she featured me on her blog. We met through a writer’s group which opened up new doors of opportunity to create and to connect with other writers, including Charlotte.  I am blessed to know her!


And the following link is a great remembrance of poetry month back in 2011 and my poem, “Looking back at me.” 

“YOU’VE GOT TO BELIEVE YOU’RE GOING TO BE OK – From Fear to Faith”, is the story of my personal journey through cancer treatment and the victory over it!  A story of challenges and triumphs – An inside peek into the waiting room and my experiences there.

As we wait, we are thrust into the unknown. Our minds can wander, and our thoughts can run away. Our attention span can become fragmented by the activity of the surroundings. We do quite a bit of waiting in life, don’t we? We wait for the airplane: Will our loved one arrive safely? We wait for the phone to ring: Will we get the job? Will the news be good or bad? Will the wayward child return? Will the outcome of the surgery be successful? Will the treatment work? Will healing come? Our patience is tried. Our faith is put to the test.

Regardless of which side of the room you are on, you can experience uncomfortable moments there. However, the waiting room is not forever—and you are not alone! God isn’t sitting by passively, watching.  God is a good God who cares about every detail of your life. God is waiting too! He is waiting for you to call—and He will answer!

My story is about the fight for my life. It is a story of challenges and triumphs—faith versus fear . . . a story of choices! It is really God’s story—the Author of Life. And this, then, is a letter from Him to you, transcribed by me. I’m just a character in this story. Each chapter has been touched, changed, brightened, and blessed by the God who wrote this long before I transcribed it. Each thought is punctuated by the mighty power of God.

I also want to share here that you yourself are a letter.  A very important letter. And guess what? God knows the end from the beginning! So, while this book is about my journey, it is also a reminder that your story – YOU – can play a significant role in the lives of others.  I pray that this book will be an encouragement for your journey.  No matter what it is… YOU’VE GOT TO BELIEVE YOU’RE GOING TO BE OK!

In our little apartment, which we affectionately called the sky cottage, we sat 38 stories high with incredible views of lake Michigan. Our lease there was supposed to be for only one year. It turned into a four year stay.
We searched every weekend all summer long, for a home… four summers in a row.  Looking back, we now see what we couldn’t see then. But God saw it. He was in it with us. He knew what was coming and He knew that we needed to be right where we were for a time. We had no idea that our temporary dwelling would serve as a landing for us and provide us with a four block walk to the treatment I would be needing.  God put us in the right place at the right time with the right people.  He allowed me to go through that treatment as He healed my body and He healed my heart and mind through an intense season, as I clung to Him for life and to His words which are “Life to those who find them and health to all their flesh.”  (Proverbs 4:22 NKJV)
Our sky cottage became our cocoon. A place of safety while a beautiful transformation was taking place. Yes, God – always the same.  Me – forever changed!